Thoughts Brewing Blog

Book Brew 19: Experiencing Self vs. Remembering Self

Written by Danielle Price Griffin | May 13, 2024 4:11:00 PM

Kahneman talks about two selves in how we experience the world—the experiencing self (essentially the “being present” self) and the remembering self (essentially the “living in the past” self). 

Part of his research has shown that if someone has a really good experience, then, at the end of the experience, sours, that person will remember the entire experience as bad. 

A good example that I have experienced myself is with the movie 28 Days Later. I loved the entire movie, but the ending, I thought, was poorly done and it therefore caused me to dislike the entire movie greatly.

 

Application in Business

It got me thinking about how this could apply in business. What things can be done at the end of a client’s experience to ensure that no matter what happened during their whole experience, they will look back on it and remember it as wonderful? 

It would likely depend on the product or service type and the type of interaction with the client. But it is definitely an interesting idea to consider for any business.

 

Philosophical Conversation on Memory and Experience

On a more existential level, Damien and I had a very long philosophical conversation about the question posed by Kahneman—something along the lines of, “If you were to go on a vacation but could not have any photos/video and had to have your memory wiped of the entire experience at the end, would you do it and how much would you pay for it?” 

Damien immediately responded, “Yes, of course, I would do it.” Mine was much more tortuous with a combination of opposing views. I likened it to the whole “If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?” Basically, if I went on a vacation but there is no physical documentation and/or memory of it, did it even happen? And if it in that case didn’t happen, is it worth paying for? I can also see wanting to do it because the experiencing self will still get to enjoy the experience as it is happening, even if the remembering self has no recall of it.

Ultimately, I found that part of my dislike for the whole situation centered around my feelings about dementia and how this must be how people with dementia feel (or not since they can’t remember).

 

Ponder This

  1. How do you balance the experiencing self and the remembering self in your personal or professional life? 
  2. Have you ever had an experience that was great in the moment but remembered poorly due to how it ended? 

Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below!

 

Books

  • Thinking Fast and Slow
  • Mindset
  • Blink